View Content #25326

By Stephanie Knight, CASLS Assistant Director

Dear Stephanie,

Robert* told me about something in class today that needs your immediate attention. Please call me at (555)-555-5555 as soon as you get this.

Sincerely,

Frank Johnson

I stared at the email as tears filled my eyes. I was depleted. My 13-hour day of teaching, meetings, parent phone calls, grading, and planning hadn’t been enough. A student was so upset that his father needed me to respond immediately. I picked up the phone to make the call. My one-year-old son started crying from his crib. My husband came home from a long day of work. I ignored both of them. I had to call. I had to see what happened with my student.

Mr. Johnson answered and said something like, “Oh! Hello, Stephanie. I am so glad you called. I just wanted to tell you that Robert says you are a wonderful teacher. I worded my email so harshly because I knew you would call as soon as you saw it, and I thought it would brighten your day.” I hung up the phone firmly submerged in mixed emotions. I was relieved that everything was going well for my student. I was grateful that his father wanted me to know I was doing well. I was angry at the email intended to frighten me into working even more for the day. I was angry with myself because I chose to ignore my family to respond to an email that absolutely could have waited until the next day.

Thankfully, that email was a turning point for me. I awoke the next morning resolved to take back my life. I had to set boundaries. Without those boundaries, I wouldn’t be able to be a mom, friend, or wife. I wouldn’t even be able to be a teacher. I was too poured out to be able to pour into anyone.

Slowly, I learned to embrace boundaries for my life. To start, I set aside two days a week during the summer for intensive planning and resource creation so that nights and weekends during the school year would become less arduous. Next, I stopped answering work emails after 5:00 p.m. Finally, I protected Saturdays for family time. In essence, I empowered myself to control my life instead of chasing some illusive notion of teaching perfection. And because I had more rest, I was a better for it. My family benefited, but so did my students. I learned to see boundaries for what they were-essential tools for achieving excellence.

*Names have been changed